Came home from work one day and my wife told me she had made my funeral arrangements…been eating out ever since.
Retirement is not easy…I was doing nothing one day…and got behind.
Wanted a John Deere mower for my birthday…wife got me one…doing good…except the grass is hard on the plastic blades.
I’m pretty handy around the house…I’m learning to fix most everything I break.
You’ve heard of “honey do” lists…my wife gives me “honey don’t” lists.
I used to hate house work…come to think of it…I still do.
I don’t mind being a “late bloomer”…but a cactus.
I was first in my high school class…if you turn the list upside down.
Being young was tough on me…being old is tough on me…it’s hard being me.
When I was young, I wanted the girls to call me “honey”…they never did. Now that I’m old…they always do.
My sister, who is an only child, called me today…now she’s delusional.
My English teacher told me that English would never be my first language.
Smile at someone today…they’ll wonder what you’re up to.